Relationships are great; they should be fun and exciting – especially if it’s your first. However, for some young people relationships can be the opposite of this and are abusive. We know that those aged 16 – 25 are more vulnerable when it comes to abusive relationships. This site is all about giving you information and advice so that you don’t find yourself in an unsafe relationship.
There are five types of abuse:
Using words, insults, or threats to make you feel bad about yourself. It can be shouting and swearing, but it can also be simple things like tone of voice – do you ever feel uncomfortable about how your partner speaks to you?
This means money, so it might be taking something of yours, or constantly asking and taking money without returning it, or destroying your property.
EMOTIONAL (sometimes known as psychological)
These are things that make you feel bad or question yourself. It can include verbal insults or put downs, threats to make you do what they wants these might be towards you or someone you love. Saying things about friends to isolate you and leave you lonely. This can even include constant texting and checking your whereabouts.
This means physical harm to you or someone you love, it includes hitting, grabbing, or even using a weapon. A person being physically abusive can cause minor to sever injuries.
Rape is sexual abuse, or forcing you to do something sexual that you don’t want to do; either by force or persuasion – “you would if you loved me!” Sexual abuse can also be verbal, insults about how you are in bed or put downs because you won’t have sex.
Abuse can be experienced in many ways, and you could experience all types at different points in your relationship. Generally there is an escalation (increase) of abuse in a relationship so it may start with insults and then become physical. We also see a cycle in these relationships where there will be an incident but then a period where things calm down, there may be apologies or gifts, but eventually something else will happen. This cycle is what keeps people in the relationship as they may think it’s “a one off” or won’t happen again.
If you are worried about your relationship then take our quiz, or act on it and speak to someone you can trust.